Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Boundaries, Sim City

Love Sim City, the future edition. Have to limit my time on it so I get other stuff done, so I set a timer. World building was something I did constantly as a kid to help me fall asleep (not much has changed), so this is right up my ally.

Breaker's Ruin is coming along nicely. A narcissistic villain is about to show up, so that'll be fun.

Reading Boundaries, and it's awesome! Super helpful. I didn't have the word for what was driving me crazy until I read this and realized, oh, boundaries! Got a hyper-critical, controlling mother-in-law? Boom, boundaries! Got a neighbor who's pushing to dye your kid's hair? Boundary!

I love the power of no.

The more I say it, the better I feel, so I'm teaching my kids what a healthy boundary is, too. One day I'll try to poke my nose in their business and they'll say, "No, Mom." That's when I'll know I got it right.

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances -- Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions -- Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others -- Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator -- Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: 

- Can I set limits and still be a loving person? 
- What are legitimate boundaries? 
- What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? 
- How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? 
- Aren't boundaries selfish? 
- Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries? 

Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend offer biblically-based answers to these and other tough questions, showing us how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves.

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